Unless you aren’t on social media, you’ve probably heard that we welcomed Scarlett Monroe to our family.
Born on November 19th at 8:42pm, Scarlett weighed 7lbs 2oz and was 19in long. Isn’t she just perfection? Just soak in those cheeks for a moment.
Our social media announcement came as quite a shock to a lot of people because up until then we hadn’t said a word about hoping to adopt.
Because we weren’t actively trying to adopt.
It’s amazing how families are formed. We had been saving and prepping for our next attempt at an adoption and were planning to start the process in 2019. Life has a funny way of changing all the plans.
So many people when starting the adoption process (even ourselves) ask “how do you do it,” “where do we start,” etc. And there’s no one way, really. When we first began our journey in 2014 we regularly heard that adoptions happen through word-of-mouth. But as someone who was just exploring the world of adoption and knew virtually nothing, I thought “who in the world would we know?” Again, life is funny and it turned out both of our children would come to us via word-of-mouth.
One very ordinary day I was on the MarcoPolo app chatting with some friends. We talk almost daily and it’s an amazing app to keep us connected. One friend hopped on and said to me something along the lines of “Hey Court, my cousin is pregnant and is considering adoption so I told her to call you.” And I said “Ok.”
I truly expected nothing to come of it. Despite how exciting this news is, we’ve had multiple referrals fall through so I didn’t think much of it. I shared with Bryce what was said and he felt the exact same way and life continued on. We forgot about it.
Then, on September 22nd, we received an email through the Expectant Parents contact form on our website. And I freaked out a little bit. It was our dear friends cousin.
I emailed her immediately and then told Bryce what was happening. And then waited. And then returned to life as normal.
Nine days later, we got a response. Slowly, we began talking via email. Then we had a phone call. Next thing we knew, we had plans to go to Utah to meet.
Meeting was amazing. We were nervous, anxious, scared, excited… all the feelings. But it was amazing. Tenashia welcomed us into her home and we got to hang out and let our kids play together. It was so fun watching Hudson play with her daughter and learning about each other. She made us feel so comfortable. She was no stranger.
On Monday, November 19th we got the call. Actually, I missed 3 phone calls and multiple texts from Tenashia because Bryce let me sleep in that day. He had taken Hudson out for a doughnut when I awoke to the list of notifications on my phone. And I knew. One return call confirmed everything. I tried to hold the tears back while on the phone with Tenashia, listening to her struggle through the pain of contractions. Next I called Bryce and yelled “THUNDERCATS ARE GO!” in true Juno fashion. He rushed home and we had our car packed within an hour. Bryce had very little sleep the night before so while out with Hudson, he picked up a 5 hour energy before we began the drive to Utah.
We got a phone call somewhere around Twin falls, ID that Tenashia wasn’t progressing and that it was time for a c-section. We wouldn’t make it in time but that didn’t stop Bryce from driving as fast as possible.
We dropped Hudson off with his birth family before heading to the hospital. That boy didn’t bat an eyelash at us saying goodbye to him for a two day slumber party. And Marissa was in town for the slumber party fun! So, so special for Hudson to spend that time with them. I’m so grateful for them.
We made it to the hospital at 10:30pm. After chatting with Tenashia, getting hospital bracelets, and hearing all about the events we missed, we were taken upstairs to see the most precious little girl. We walked into a room where she was laying swaddled like a burrito, sleeping peacefully. The nurses were so so sweet and left Bryce and I alone in the room with this precious little girl to meet her. We sat in two chairs facing each other, taking turns holding her and sobbing. She was here.
The hospital was truly amazing and so accommodating to us, when we know they absolutely do not need to be. We were given a room down the hall and spent the next 3 days at the hospital with Tenashia, taking turns loving this sweet new spirit. Everything in the hospital was a bonding and growing moment – the good and the hard.
The day of relinquishment I couldn’t control my emotions. I sobbed in the shower, in our hospital room, in the cafeteria, while staring at Scarlett, and during the relinquishment. Tenashia asked us to be there for it. Words cannot describe how harsh, jarring, and final that legal document is. Tears and guilt freely flowed out of me. I hate that our happiness stems from another mothers pain and sacrifice. But so touched to hear we were an answer to Tenashia’s prayers. Adoption is so bittersweet. We are so fortunate to be chosen as Scarlett’s parents. We are so fortunate to have grown our family once again by so many more people. We can’t wait to grow together out of love for this very special little girl.